What's that sound?

That's the sound of fabulous women all over America ramping up from summer's blissed-out sparkle-on-the -water-at-sundown-RPM into September overdrive.

There's apparently no way out ... So, this year, instead of the blues, I'm going to follow my very own top 5 ways of keeping Back-to-school overdrive in check:

#1 - Find someone who doesn't care and hang out with her

#2 - Practice Deep Breathing and Love Bats regularly

#3 - Throw back a chilled glass of Rose, repeat

#4 - Contemplate life as an anteater and realize that you're still ahead




And, lastly,

#5 - Cut all of your to-do lists down by 20%

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I like her sound . . . a lot

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Old friends rock

I so love my old friends. I just wish we could live a bit closer in proximity.

I am old fashioned, so I always believed we would pop into each others' houses/apartments for a cup of coffee, and have an easier time checking out our kids' Halloween costumes, piano recitals, and other big developmental leaps ...

That's someone else's movie as it turns out.

But my movie isn't so bad. I am always comforted to rediscover every year how with just one visit and 2-3 phone calls a year, my oldest friends help me become my best self. They ask me to let go of the stuff that's outdated - the energy drains that just don't serve me anymore (even when I haven't noticed that yet). They also notice what I have (and have not) made of myself. They are patient and encourage me to stay on my path.

In the years when I feel like my life is a bit stalled or that I am losing something I held dear, upon reconnecting with a treasured friend, I sense that I've been touched - no, nourished. My soul is a bit more complete.

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Weather delays mom, not her son

While I got turned around with a cancelled flight, my son brushed up his skimboard skills. Wonder if he'll get the 360 this summer . . . Last year two kids (10 and 14) from SF shared their tips and tricks with him . . . Bet he's hoping they show up soon!

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Friend me, follow me, humble me

Can a friendship originate with a click of the mouse? A decision to "Follow?" Yesterday, I received a Tweet from someone I follow on Twitter exclaiming:

Just cracked 4,000 followers! On my way to the Top 100 Twitter list...

My reaction: Unfollow . . . Immediately.
But a few days earlier, someone I follow Tweeted:

Golf is done. A little rough but had fun. Heading back home to fire up the gumbo chill the stella

My reaction: Follow with interest

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Getting things done (GTD)

I found this post on Arif & Ali's blog while exploring Guy Kawasaki's, Getting things done index on Alltop. Even though I don't think these guys are talking about issues we deal with as parents, or as mothers, specifically, check it out for some practical solutions that could be very useful for Back-to-school season:

Why Some People Always are so Efficient, Yet Relaxed at the Same time . It’s because of Rules. We had them as School kids, there are Rules at office, then then there are traffic Rules. Rules Rules Rules everywhere. Who needs ‘em, Wouldn’t it be better if we just got rid of them? No, you know that it wouldn’t be. And that’s because, it’s these Rules that are in place to provide us with the freedom to do what we can, within limits . . . Read post

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Small town toy store

I stopped in Portsmouth, New Hampshire last weekend, on our way up north to Damariscotta, Maine to collect our daughter from camp. Not only is there a great set of coffee shops and galleries in downtown Portsmouth, there are no fewer than 3 FABULOUS toy stores within walking distance. That's a sign of a healthy town . . .

What's more is that we could stroll and browse in and out of these great toy stores with our son, while catching pretty glimpses of the seacoast, historic architecture, and a working tug boat yard.

Let's just say that I fell back in love with the notion of the small, livable village on the seaside.

Romantic? Yes, most definitely. But smaller scale, walkable villages are also modern, sustainable, and perhaps even better for your health.

P.S. Tugboats are cool

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Ouch! Got anything for this pain?

I tend to stop blogging when I am in a funk, so it's been very difficult to show up here and write.

Who really needs to hear Coco's misery musings? Who needs more mishap, misfortune, mindlessness in the inbox? I am looking for solutions, not summaries.

So, what exactly is the solution?

First, identify the problem, and expose whether the problem is an ego trip or a genuine snafu. My funks tend to be related to such garden variety themes as:

• Work-family balance
• Lack of time for myself
• Concern about the kids
• Loneliness
• Frustration about work
• Maintaining my marriage

This week I have landed squarely on the second item in my list: "Lack of time for myself" which makes me behave like the swordfish above, poking his long nose into places it shouldn't go.

After the work week and chores, what's left for me? Is it possible to carve a margin for my own pleasure? Is this pain just to be expected - a passing thing - or is it time to do some serious editing?

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Edit yourself: Use this cheap writing coach

Need a clue about how you sound? Wanna know what kind of impression you make on the meta level? Try Wordle. When you put your URL into its processor, it spits back a visual of the topics you cover . . . Handy, no? Tells me I need to cut down on "cancer" and "news." Thanks to Craig Stolz for tipping me off to Wordle.

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My horoscope advice - from AstroBarry

Talk about good advice . . . I had to pass this on:

Why search far and wide? Expecting the voice of wisdom to arrive in the form of an exquisitely exotic-skinned guru from a far-off land, speaking in cryptic riddles that supposedly capture the existential quandaries of life (if only you could actually understand 'em)? You've already put way too much pressure on that ridiculous need for a wham-bam, bells-and-whistles type of higher-awareness-granting event or experience...when, in fact, you're privy to just as much valuable information about your next steps from the same old familiar faces and environments you encounter every day. As I recently pointed out, the big Answers (capital 'A') can be found in the tiniest casual exchanges and the most seemingly inconsequential of moments, without any fancy terminology (or its requisite hours of study) or devout bouts of meditation (and its corresponding flickers of bright white light) required to 'make it count'. Look no further than your typical haunts and the regularly expected gang of characters. A full-moon vibe in the air will put everybody in devilishly rare form, which is also a perfect setting for folks not to watch what they say very closely. In this comfortably homey setting, amidst the cheekier-than-usual remarks and louder laughter (with maybe just a touch of controversy, all in good fun), a few choice words will find themselves uttered, perhaps by a mouth not entirely sure of what's coming out of it, and nonchalantly hit your ears with the resonance that this is exactly what you needed to hear right now. And suddenly, all at once, your mind is clear.

More horoscopes by AstroBarry at BettyConfidential.com

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Fat Summer - another look

Obesity was in the news a lot last summer. This post takes a fresh look at obesity ... it is one of my personal favorites:

Fat Summer

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One of the world's best elders turns 90 soon

Nelson Mandela is one of the most inspiring individuals my generation has had the privilege of encountering. Although he retired from public life nearly a decade ago, and experiences some trouble getting around now, his message to a London crowd gathered to celebrate his upcoming 90th birthday is as fresh and relevant as ever:

"Where human beings are being oppressed, there is more work to be done. Our work is for freedom for all."

"It is time for new hands to lift the burdens. It is in your hands now. I thank you," added Mandela.

If you are a fan of leadership study, you won't want to miss Rick Stengel's piece in the July 21, 2008 issue of Time Magazine. He has written a wonderful short profile, Mandela: His 8 Lessons of Leadership in honor of Mandela's birthday.

While many of the "leadership lessons" will sound familiar, such as, Keep your friends close - and your enemies even closer, each one is, like Mandela himself, a timeless reminder to continue "the struggle."

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Communicating with doctors: Practice when you're healthy!

This morning's news feeds brought my attention to 2 important stories:

Men not told of severity of wife's cancer

Breast-conserving surgery leaves many cancer patients disappointed

Both of these stories reflect the same core issue: that we (men and women) are not empowered to seek ample information from care providers. So, what to do?

First, practice how to communicate with your care provider when it isn't urgent. That way, when you are in an urgent situation, you are prepared to seek the information you need.

After that, keep practicing until you have established trustworthy communication with a doctor or nurse. Why is that so hard for so many of us?

If you are a woman with breast cancer, or you love someone with breast cancer, do your best to educate yourself about breast-conserving surgery vs. mastectomy (with or without reconstruction). Find pictures of options online. It is important to get help understanding surgical outcomes, asymmetry, scar tissue, etc., and finding your own comfort within the necessary trade-offs. (Easier said than done when staring down a cancer diagnosis, I realize . . .)

Likewise, before a husband can readily "hear" a loved one's terminal cancer diagnosis, he has to practice "hearing" about menopause and other basic women's issues.

Guys, consider it good practice to contemplate your wife's vulnerability while she is healthy. Remember: practice, not perfection, is the name of the game.

And, just in case anyone needs this helpful piece from Y-me?, here are 10 ways of being there for your wife when she cancer. . .

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Preppy boat people ...

So much for dreams of yachts, fancy lives and endless summer . . . This photo tells the real story . . . For another chuckle at my expense read this post

___________________________

Coco sinking with a few of her favorite elders

___________________________

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ROLL with it - I promise, you can!

Tonight's post is just a short little ditty on the power of perseverance and will:

... Not the old-fashioned pushing that looks like repression and forcing, but the new kind of gentle touch that truly seems to express, "Hey, let's play, let the chips fall as they may; I am doing the best I can and I will thrive through this challenge."

Sound like B.S. to you?

I'm too young to convince you that it isn't total B.S. But what I can do is let you know that I try to practice this approach daily, especially through the REALLY TOUGH STUFF - like when you feel like you are literally growing brain cells to cope with the complexity of the things you never expected would land on your plate.

Try it. Roll with it like those boys in the picture above. Give yourself the words, "Even though __________ is happening, I continue to work toward ____________ with a joyful heart. You'll contact the self-awareness and power that are available to all ...

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Sailboat celebration

Rare SS class sailboat celebration this weekend:

The 1924 SS class sailboat plies the waters in the East Passage.

The SS class sloop from the east end of Long Island, New York will be commemorated this weekend in honor of its 100th anniversary. Designed in 1908 and built over the course of many years, the SS class is the oldest continually active racing class in North America.

The photo and description below comes from the Jamestown Press.

There are eight different kinds of wood in the boat including a white oak duck's head tiller that was hand carved by Ansel Tuthill in 1938, when he was 20 years old. The frames or ribs are made of hackmatac - a deciduous conifer similar to larch. In order to have the grain run straight through a curve, stumps were dug up and laboriously hand sawn into slices. The pattern was then traced onto a spot where the root was turning, and carved to shape.

SS59 is planked with Atlantic white cedar, and decked with western red cedar- the centerboard trunk, centerboard, and rudder are cypress, while the spars are all made of old growth Douglas fir.

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